Friday, March 27, 2015

MARCH 27, 2015 - Mr. Jones is DEAD!

I know it’s been a long time since I’ve blogged.  Stomach hell, swollen “dancing” knee injury, sore throat, and general “muse blockage,” tonight, as I sat listening to the ocean waves on my new upstairs patio, I was inspired - re-ignited.  I didn’t however, set to task - until Mr. Jones came to visit.

I have never been one to wear house slippers, but being as there is a bit of sand and dust here, and I have a free pair of white slip-ons from the Hotel Vernet in Paris, I keep them next to my bed, and have made it a habit to use them.  Coincidentally, they are engraved with the Hotel Vernet insignia “HV” - which reminds me of Hazel and Violet (my granddaughters) every time I walk in them.  They are officially, my “ZaZa” slippers.

Tonight, they are at the “lavenderia” (laundromat).  I was to have picked up my clean things by 6, and missed the “fetching” time, as I sat idly watching the sun go down with my friend, Trenie.

At 10PM, after putting clean sheets on my bed, taking a quick tepid shower, and preparing a lovely pasta with fresh green beans, I settled in with a Ben Stiller movie.  My leg was propped high on two sofa cushions, gel pack wrapped snuggly around my knee.  I was enjoying my “pasta verdure,” when out of the corner of my eye, I sensed movement. 
“Egads!”  I cried aloud.  It’s a cockroach the size of two grown men’s thumbs!  Mortified, but trapped, I decided to let it continue in its direction towards my closet, wondering if it would find a home in my sneaker, or crawl up into my suitcase.  I purposed to buy boric acid and sugar tomorrow, a surefire concoction that purportedly makes cockroaches explode.  Lovely.

Three seconds later, “Mr. Jones” returns.  “Mr. Jones” is the name I used when addressing any ill-behaved male child.  

“Homework, Mr. Jones.”

“Garbage out, Mr. Jones?” etc.  You get it.  Well I was determined to NOT let this little sucker ruin my pasta party.  Quickyl I unwrapped the gel pack, hopped out of bed, opened the closet and grabbed a pair of flips flops.  The thought crossed my mind that it is highly possible that when I turn around Mr. Jones will be gone.

But no!!  There he was - attempting to pass under the duct-taped door threshold.  NEVER did I think I would praise God for duct tape, but tonight?  I did!  Mr. Jones was trapped.

I began to talk audibly to Mr. Jones, telling him to give it up, and not move until I came up with a plan of action.  I did so quickly.

I grabbed my Rebok and BAM!  Splat! DEAD! I have it heard it said that cockroaches can withstand ANYthing, but he’s still there, his innards out, his antennae erect.  I am a warrior!

Tomorrow I will figure where to hold his funeral.  Viva la Mexico!


Sunday, March 8, 2015

Intestinal Hiatus

It's been a month since I arrived down here.  Last Saturday I ate some fresh strawberries (which I soaked in vinegar and water), and got the dreaded traveller's bug.  Started antibiotic and 5 days of "no fun."

Ate great for 3 days, but today's cantaloupe and yogurt set me off again.  I've neglected my blog!!!

Lots to come though!  LOCALS AND OTHER CREATURES!

Monday, March 2, 2015

PV BUDGET SO FAR!

I am in NO way living high on the hog.  I really don’t eat much at all.  I basically eat one meal per day.  Sometimes a snack late at night.  Now that I  my own place, I prepare my own meals most of the time - because I love to.  The dollar is strong right now, but it looks like my expenses (without rent/utilities) MAY average about $200 per week at MOST. That’s $800/month - plus rent of 6000 pesos for now (about $402) - bringing my personal budget to about $1202.  This is OVER my goal, so obviously I’ll have to shave off the beverages!

BUDGET - 300 pesos (80 pesos free) local phone 300
400 pesos at Barcelona tapas - Trenie         400
treated at La Rustica (my portion would have been 150 pesos) 150
more treats from Debi (my portion would have been 300 pesos) 300
Buses - 7.5 pesos x 4 to El Centro (from anywhere in PV) - 35 pesos x2(
Sayulita to Walmart in PV and back)        100
Taxi from El Centro to Marina (I negotiated down to 80 peso) 80

ADVICE:  put on a few pounds and wear a blonde wig!

Huevos desayuno (breakfast) Choco Banana - w/tip          80
2 cocktails for 80 pesos plus tip                  90
4 bottled waters x .50 pesos each          20
1 diet coke for 10 pesos 3 Be Light for 10 pesos 40
2 bottles wine  (is there a “thirsty” trend here?”)            180
Thirsty Cougar 2 for one well drink/guacamole 80 plus tip) 100
Sorianna (Gouda, crackers, serrano, Oso Negro, Be-Light 300
Vinegar, 2 cucumbers, salsa verde, avocado,, pesto sauce,
gnocchi, 2 Activia yogurts,
BUS 4 ways                           30
2 Big Bottled waters at hotel                 40
Taco                          10
Raspado (Shaved Ice)                           20
Water and Be-Light                   64
Sorianna Guacamole ingredients (plus tip to “bagger”) 80
2 bus tickets                          15
Tip for 2 free drinks at Krystal           30
Starbuck’s coffee and tip                    60
TOTAL WEEK ONE (at 14.5 exchange rate)               1259 pesos =  $85.44

Debi’s generosity saved me quite a bit (plus 5 days of free lodging). I look forward to settling in to a place where I will prepare all my own meals with local fresh produce.  A few meals out are imperative as well. I look forward to reporting my bargain “finds.” Buying water and other beverages at Costco (yes, my American Costco membership works here), as well as foods from the local “mercado,” will save mucho!


I DID NOT include my Timeshare Week at Krystal Resort, since this was paid for a long time ago, and will NOT be a normal expenditure.  Now that i am in my own place, for 6000 pesos per month, things will get clearer.  A gal in the hotel boutique, Ana, did a lot of math with me today.  I wish Carmen were here, because, I didn’t understand it all, but was too tired to work through it, so I pretended I understood.  Apparently, the Spanish I speak is pretty good, so they think I’m fluent - and I am definitely NOT.  Ana tried to explain why I should consider buying a place, even if it’s just for an investment, and I don’t actually live in it.  I’ll be investigating more this week.  But I can’t imagine HOW I could POSSIBLY BUY something, given my financial situation.  Ana assured me  it was definitely a possibility.  And there’s nothing in it for her.  She owns two condos here and rents them out.  AND - I loved her sparkly turquoise nails, so she let me put a coat of sparkle over my French manicure.  Yay!  I LOVE sparkles!

I HAVE NOW BEEN HERE for three weeks and two days.  My expenses have increase, as I had to pay for one month's rent, plus a deposit equal to 2 months rent.

Nonetheless, I can already see that life is less expensive here.  HOWEVER, I am living on the edge.  Trying to prove a point?  Perhaps.  But also keenly aware of each cent that I spend, I realize that it would be easy to eat out at every meal, take a taxi home from downtown, a mere 2500 steps, and pick up a Mexican trinket at every corner. After all, I want to reflect Mexico in my home, don't I?

So, after having lived in my humble abode for little more than a week, and having purchased, cleaning supplies, a sitting pillow, a beach towel and umbrella, kitchen necessities, bathroom sundries, and a few spices and condiments, I figure my weekly expenditure average is about $200.  Way too much!

I am hoping to adapt and grow, as I learn to LIVE here, and not pretend to be on an eternal vacation.  I pat myself on the back for having prepared my own quesadillas and guacamole, along with rice and homemade beans, but i recognize that I've a long way to go.

Salud! Cheers!  Here's to a HUGE learning experience and my first bat at turning lemons into lemonade!!

Sunday, March 1, 2015

“Magic of Abanicos,” “14,000-foot Journey,” “St. Anthony and the Boob”

The Japanese hand fan appeared in Europe in the 15th century when the Spaniards opened trade routes to China and Japan. Though originally rare and expensive, this useful accessory soon became common.  Valencia, Spain, became one of the most prolific producers of outstanding hand fans.

I wish I’d had known the meanings of fan gestures while I was sitting at Mass last Sunday when I met Consuelo.  Apparently I was saying a lot more than, “I’m stinking hot!”

When my hand wearied, I held it close to my heart, saying “I love you” to about ten people!

Stopping tentatively to listen to the priest, thinking I may possibly have understood what he just said, I placed a finger on top of my fan, which means, “I want to talk to you.”  (which, in fact, I do want to set up an appointment with the priest)

At one point, I rested the elbow of the fan-holding hand, in the palm of my other, placing the fan on my lips.  I don’t know if anyone saw me, but I was “asking for a kiss!”

I don’t recall holding my open fan over my left ear, so thankfully I told no one to “not reveal our secret.”

I fanned vigorously at one point, then slowly at another.  I should have kept up the pace, because slow fanning says, “I am a married woman and not interested in you.”

I have no idea who I looked at when I slowly and deliberately closed my fan, saying,  “I promise to marry you.”

Perhaps I held my closed fan behind my head as I left the Church.  This means “forget me not.”

I opened and closed my fan quite a few times, telling someone that they were “cruel!”

Opening the fan slowly, I was obviously telling Jesus to “wait for me.”

I never dropped the fan, which means “I belong to you”, nor did I lend it to anyone, which brings bad luck. 

No one used it as a sunshade, as we were indoors, but if they had, they would have been telling me that I am ugly and they don’t like me.  Whew!

If someone had used it as a shade while covering her face she would have been saying, “Be careful they are watching us”. 

After Mass, when Consuelo and I set up our “coffee and salad” date, she thanked me for fanning her a bit, and told me she was looking forward to my visit to her humble home.

I entered into the darkness of this narrow concrete place, climbing the uneven steep steps from the door on the sidewalk.  The wall along the stairwell was stained and dingy, as Consuelo welcomed me into her kitchen/living room area.

As in every Mexican house, the TV was on full blast.  This also occurs in restaurants and bars.  TV always in the background.  Her table, against the wall, was stacked with some papers, a child’s sweater, (Mexicans here constantly put sweaters on their kids, even when it’s sweltering), and a flowered plastic plate flanked by a fork and a knife, with a paper towel folded on the plate.  This was for me.

I complimented her for having such a wonderful home.  It was high, narrow and deep.  Behind the kitchen was a sleeping area, the entry to which was covered with a partial curtain.  I could see bunk beds and another full size bed.  Lots of pale pink. Consuelo told me that two of her daughters and two of her granddaughters lived there with her.

The husband, father, and grandfather of these females, had passed away three years ago.  He had dropped dead of a heart attack while on the soccer field.  He was born in 1954, which would have made him 57 when he passed.  He had left this home for the family, the downstairs of which also had a kitchen, and housed Consuelo and the daughter without children.  His picture hung, crooked, on the wall above the table.

I have noticed also, that photos, and pictures of Saints hang unevenly, and randomly in many Mexican places.  There will be a crucifix at chest level, near the light switch, and a Sacred Heart of Jesus in velvet about a foot from the ceiling, and a large dusty mirror somewhere in between and to the right or left.
“Muy guapo,” (very handsome) I said, and she shook her head in agreement.  Then she showed me the humongous salad she had prepared, and said that it was all for me, because she had eaten!

“Dios mio!” (my God!) I cried.  “This is huge!  You must eat some of this with me.”  She giggled and said once again that she had already eaten.  She then offered me a chicarron (fried pork rind).  Now I had only ever had the “chips” kind that are allowed liberally on a low carb diet.  but these were the real thing, and apparently they’re quite the treat.  She had made them because it was her youngest granddaughter’s birthday, and she had no money to buy a cake. When I asked her why she didn’t make one, she told me her oven didn’t work.  Thank God for the stovetop!




“Of course I’ll have one,” I said, but she wanted to load me up!  Finally she settled for giving me one, which I dug into with a bit of trepidation.  Tasty, fatty, gloppy, breaded, it reminded me of eating the chicken skin or fat off of roasts or steaks at my Slovak grandmother’s house when I was young.  My great grandmother, Baba (Elizabeth Balent), who lived to be 92, loved to eat fat.  I’m not sure I would ever “choose” this dish, but I’m grateful to have experienced it, and pleased Consuelo as well.




After eating a small portion of the giant salad of lettuce, cucumber, steamed broccoli, green peppers, and hardboiled eggs, and scolding Consuelo for not telling me I was coming on little Sarah’s 5th birthday, in walked the girls!  Her daughters, about 32 and 34, were lovely and welcoming.  The angels, Sarah, now 5, and Kimberly, 9, were bright, and huggable, and eager to engage in conversation and play with this white-headed anomoly in their “abuela’s” kitchen.

They were intrigued with my fan, so I let them play with it (which I now know is bad luck).  Nonetheless, they fanned and posed and giggled.  They sang me songs, and we all sang Happy Birthday in Spanish.  They picked at the salad and were told they had to wait for their chicarrones, the special birthday treat.

Sarah sat on my lap and looked at my face with her dark, exotic-looking eyes and dimpled smile.  I put a horse braid in Kimberly’s shiny coal black locks.  I taught them hand games, including thumb-fighting, and they were in hog heaven as I pulled my palms out from under theirs and quickly slapped their hands.  Quick learners, they began to be too fast for me.  We laughed and laughed.

Then Consuelo suggested we go downstairs where it was cooler, but to please excuse how poor and ugly it was down there.  It was indeed cooler, and no different appearance-wise than the upstairs. What was clear, was that she had filled this home with security and comfort and love.

One of the daughters turned on music and lounged on the couch, as Sarah, Kimberly and I began to swirl around, holding hands, dancing, and laughing.  I made them do twirls and dips and “freezes,” in time with the music.  It was wonderful.  The daughters clapped and Consuelo beamed.

Kimberly had to do homework, so I traced Sarah’s hand on a piece of white paper with her favorite color crayon, purple.  I made it into a turkey.  Then she wanted to trace my hand, and draw my long nails and rings on it.  She then put her hand inside the traced figure of mine, and I traced hers again, and put nails on it.

“Anillos también! Como ti!” she exclaimed. (rings too, like you!).  So I drew a ring on each of her fingers; a cat, a dog, a star, a heart, and a flower.  I suppose I had given her a present after all.  It had been two hours and I bade them all farewell, promising to return.  We kissed and hugged and off I went, down the steep grade to Trenie’s.  I was late for Trenie’s by about twenty minutes.

After walking a few blocks, switchbacking across the 5th of December neighborhood, I realized I was lost.  I also realized I didn’t have my phone.  I walked some more in the excruciating heat, confident that I could find her place, but after passing the same few corners one too many times, I decided to head home and get my phone to call her for directions.

Once home, no phone.  Must have left it at Consuelo’s.  Well, now I can go buy a birthday present before I traipse back up that grade!  I found a purple fan for Sarah, and picked out a fuscia one for Kimberly.  I also got the birthday girl an “anillo,” a little white and gold flower ring.

They were surprised to see me, as I plopped down on the couch, drenched, and was handed a glass of ice water from one of the daughters.  I explained I had probably left my phone here at their house, but after much searching, and calling, it was nowhere to be found.

Sarah and Kimberly came dancing out of the shower wrapped in fuzzy towels, hair wet, smiles wide.  I told them to go put their clothes on and come back, because I had presents for them.  I never saw two little girls dry off and dress so quickly!



They loved the fans, but little Sarah saw the bright pink and suddenly, purple wasn’t her favorite color anymore!  Kimberly sweetly let her sister have the fuscia one.  They danced flamenco, posed, and smothered me with gratitude.  Who would have known what magic two little abanicos could bring into two little girls'  days!



Then out came the birthday ring.  Sarah put on and held her hand out in front of her like a red carpet pro.  Kimberly was a little disappointed, but I told her that her special day was coming, March 4th.  She grinned and looked up at her mother as if to say, “I like this lady!”

Attention turned bak on my missing phone, when I began to silently mutter the Prayer to St. Anthony; "Dear St, Anthony, please come around, something is lost and cannot be found.”  As I rummaged again through my purse, I felt a lump in my breast.  My jaw dropped, I looked up, reached into my boob, and pulled out my phone!  

“Dear Lord!” I screamed, “it was right here in my boob!  Gracias a Santo Antonio!”  (Thank you, St. Anthony!)  As if we hadn’t laughed enough already!  Tears came to our eyes, as we laughed even more when I showed them my “health application” on my phone - between my journey to find Trenie’s house, and then my climb back up the hill, I had walked 14,000 steps!!!


Right in the middle of an ordinary day, music and dancing and laughter and love - this is the way of life I love.  Though very poor in material things, Consuelo’s un-matching plastic plates, uneven pictures on the wall, non-working oven, and ages old TV were no obstacles to joy.  I can’t wait to see them all again - but next time, i think I'll bring them some of my yummy Cuban crouqetas - and a cake!




Thursday, February 26, 2015

Zapatos, Sombrero, y Abenico

The door to the left will be mine to the upstairs
I am definitely taking the upstairs apartment with ocean views starting April 1st.  I and my landlord will try to rent it out while I'm in CA April 9-22 or 23.  And also while I'm gone in the summer to Italy and Bethlehem, to at least CUT my obligation for rent. I will have two terraces with an ocean view, as well as a more secure feeling.  Having a living room door on the street takes getting used to.  Victor, my landlord, said that he gets 30 or more email responses every time he lists his apartments, because everybody loves this street!  Let me know if anyone needs a vacation!

Around the corner is the beach.  I met a nice man from Canada there early this morning.  A few men meet at 7AM to have coffee, so tomorrow I am joining them and me and the one guy, John, a master electrician, will swim in the ocean.  He, like me, prefers not to swim alone.  So excited, but I PRAY I can wake up!

I walked into town with this John today and told him I was wearing my sneakers because my feet hurt in my sandals.  But now my feet are so hot! 

He had just bought $12 sandals and so I went and got some too - they are really ugly, but have a thick sole, and I walked in them all day and feel great!  For twelve bucks!


I also bought a "sea grass" hat for $15 - a very well-made one.  The guy wanted $30 but I promised him I'd bring him customers if he gave me half off.  He did.

I don't like wearing hats, but this one can be dunked in cold water without losing its shape, and it "breathes" - and it's necessary to keep the sun off my beautiful face! (smirk)



John and I walked a lot that first day, and my face was sizzling went I went to bed, despite the hat which I bought far too late in the day.  After two melanomas, fighting the sun will be this sun worshiper’s greatest challenge here.  A quick dip in the post-sunset sea provided refreshing relief for my sunburned skin and sore soles.  NOTHING, however,  could have prepared me for my walk the next day.  Talk about exhaustion! It all started with a simple “abanico.”

I had met Consuelo at Sunday Mass.  She squeezed into the pew next to me, even though I had positioned myself on the end for two purposes; one, to be solitary, and two, to feel the slight breeze through the open door next to which I had sat.

Second in the pew, I am still content, until the Church became so full that I now was actually squished.  And perspiring profusely.  Fact is, I sat for nearly forty five minutes feeling hot, anxious, and eventually, cramped. Wait, I digress.

Our Lady of Refuge is only three blocks away - arriba! - UP!  I arrived just as the bells were ringing, only to see about forty teenagers gathered in the courtyard area filling out papers - likely answering “Jesus” questions.  

I am quite familiar with “teen nights,” having been a Youth Minister at two different Churches, trying to elicit some semblance of spiritual interest out of these pre- and pubescent creatures.  I snickered a bit at the sight of these Mexican young people behaving exactly as “my students” did both in 1982 and again in 2005.  Though obviously bored, they managed to transmit sexual signals and inflict peer pressure, while simultaneously answering “God is love” for every query on their “inner-view” sheet. (I'm sure of this)

I found my place in the Son, alone in a pew exactly in the middle of the Church, near the door, where air would hopefully flow.  There were about twenty people in the Church.  The bells rang.  Teens were still scattered outside, and some sitting up front near the sanctuary.  No priest in sight.

As more faithful file in, I decide to read the day’s readings on my I-Phone 6 Roman Catholic Buddy APP.  Bells ring again at 6:45.  Still no priest, but a lot more people.  I’m now beginning to think they changed the time of the Mass behind Google’s back.

It was nearing 7PM when Consuelo plopped down next to me, forcing me to slide and squish into the lady on my right.  I took out my “abanico” (Spanish fan) I had gotten in Sevilla.  I was one of about five ladies “fanning,” as the locals are obviously acclimated to this humidity and heat.  I’m getting there!

When the bells rang again and the Mass had still not yet begun, I turned to my neighbor and asked what time Mass was supposed to begin.  She giggled and said,

“Cuando el sacerdote está listo” (When the priest is ready).  I rolled my eyes, flourished my fan, and laughed.  A friendship was born.  She admired my abanico as I waved it in front of both of us, providing a mediocre respite.  Problem is, waving a fan requires energy, and energy produces - you got it - more heat!

Mi abanico de Sevilla (My fan from Seville)

Mass did indeed begin - about 7:15 - and although my hearing aid batteries died during the celebration, I wasn’t disappointed, since I can barely follow the Mass in Spanish anyway.  I’m learning slowly, and adjusting as well, to receiving the Eucharist on my tongue (“when in Rome”), something I haven’t done since 1966.  Although I am aware of the ongoing controversy surrounding the practice of receiving in the hand, the tongue thing still kinda bugs me.

After Mass, Consuelo and I formally introduced ourselves and exchanged phone numbers.  We talked briefly about our families and grandchildren (she has five), and before I knew it, she had invited me over for coffee and food the following day.  I told her that I didn’t eat much, and that coffee would be enough and wonderful.

“Ensalada, entonces!” (Salad, then!) she insisted, and I accepted.  Yummy!  Coffee and salad!  (Dios Mio! - My God!), what a combo.

Bag on head, this mama and niña climbed - I followed, bent forward like  a hungry giraffe!
When I arrived at her humble two-story concrete “row home” at the top of Uruguay St., I was drenched.  Not mincing words here - this was all out sweat, not mere perspiration.  The ascent was grueling.  It is both steep and uneven.
  

Consuelo met me at the corner with an "almost" completely teeth-filled smile.  Before we entered, she apologized for her poverty.  I assured her that her home was perfect, and that I already knew that she was, in many ways, an immeasurably  rich woman - or I would never had "fanned" her.  She agreed, giggled, and gave me a big tight hug, before sitting me 

Nueva amigas! (new friends)
A salad fit for a Queen!
before a lovely huge "ensalada" that was all for me! (Oddly, she had already eaten.)

I barely made a dent in it, however, that was neither all I ate - nor all I experi-enced.  With-in the next two hours, I would indulge in the enticing wealth that has drawn me back to Mexico for more than thirty years.

(Stay tuned for the "Magic of Abanicos," the "14,000-foot Birthday," and "St. Anthony and the Boob" story)














Wednesday, February 25, 2015

FEBRUARY 20, 2015

Canadians, Couples, and Captain Don’s!

Mine is the open door downstairs



What a glorious day!  Trenie and I enjoyed a complimentary meal at Cinque Terra at Krystal last night.  She spent the night, and claims I didn’t snore!  (good friend)  Today, my property manager, Victor,drove us and my two pieces of luggage (yes, that’s ALL I brought for my new life) to my new abode on Calle Paraguay! Wahoo!
My street - Paraguay

 I absolutely love it here.  Quaint quiet street in the middle of it all!  Colorful and cozy, I feel so very blessed to be here.  I bought hangers, shower gel, beans, some veggies, salt and pepper, and olive oil today at La Ley, claimed to be the most inexpensive grocery store in town!  Lucky me, it’s a block away.  I also had two copies of my key made, one for Trenie and one for guests, for a dollar apiece.



After shopping, I decided to high tail it over to Captain Don’s, two blocks away.  This is a local hangout for Americans and Canadians.  The owner is my neighbor, Don, who unfortunately lost both his wife and his left leg in the last three years.  The latter from cancer, the former form hospital staff infection in the United States. 

Anyway, I was sitting with Darrell whose wife left today for Denver, Colorado to do taxes as an accountant.  She will return on April 16, so he is “solo” for awhile.  We chatted awhile when in walked a young mother of thirty, Alejandra, with a daughter, Selene, 9, and a son, Ricardo, 7, as well as a backpack carrying the ashes of her deceased son, Jared, 3.  She had been living in Guadalajara for two years, where she met a fellow who brought her and her children here for a vacation, as well as an opportunity for to sprinkle the ashes of her child into the sea.

The father of her three children is allegedly in jail for being in the wrong place at the wrong time.  Stupidly (admittedly) she hooked up with a guy with enough money to make her “sprinkling” dream come true.  This morning, he slapped her and punched her.  Moments later, after he whacked her precious son, she ran away with nothing  but her backpack full of ashes, and a few pieces of clothing for each of them.  The sacred beach where she had wanted let her deceased baby fly, is now toxic to her soul.

Darrell, Alejandra, Selene, Ricardo, and I
I spoke to nine-year-old, obviously very bright, Selene on the side, and dug for the truth.  In the end, Darrell and I believed their story.  They needed a little more than three thousand pesos (about $200) to transport them by bus back to Mexicali.  I bought them dinner, for about twenty bucks, and Darrell agreed to pay for their bus tickets to Mexicali, IF I would accompany them to the bus terminal.  I walked over to the OXXO (7-11 equivalent) where tickets can be bought, and found out there is no availability until 7:30PM tomorrow.

Darrell generously offered to take them all home, let them shower, watch TV, and eat some more, and we all agreed to meet back at Captain Don’s at 5PM tomorrow, from whence I planned to accompany the trio to the bus terminal and bid them adios.  Even if they are scamming us, we will have done our best to help what we believe to be honest people in a crappy situation.  I did  take photos of their “certification” papers (just in case).

We enlisted the translation aid of one of the servers, Gloria, and she too believed the story, but warned us that scams do indeed abound.  However, if the three get on to the bus, there is no way they can return the ticket for cash.  So tomorrow will tell.  I read a text from Alejandra’s mother, saying, “Please find a way to come here.  You will experience life with no worries.  My house is paid for and I have plenty of beds and food.  I also have a job for you where I work with the telephone company, and your “tia” (aunt) can take the children to school and bring them home each day.

Darrell bonding with the children
A blowfish captivated the 2 young ones



Darrell did indeed give them food, shelter, showers, clothes laundering, and a wonderful day at the beach.  




Trenie agreed to escort this wayward bunch to the bus station with me, so after feeding them tacos on the street, we did so.  We all cried.  Selene had a handful of change, and, like any child, rich or poor, decided to drop a coin into the massage chair at the bus terminal.  It was priceless to see these siblings giggle as they enjoyed the titillating rollers of this strange mechanism.

Tears, fears, and cheers - they were off.  Trenie and I bussed it back to town, hoping they would arrive to Tepic safely for a thirty-minute layover, (nowhere near as exotic as Anthony Bourdain’s), then on to Mexicali, for a total of about twenty four hours to home.

Alejandra promised to text me both from Tepic and Mexicali, but I never heard from her.  I pray they arrived safely.

                               It’s times like this, I count my blessings.

As if that weren’t enough, Trenie and I were in for the timeshare presentation of our lives.  Desperate for any cash we could get, we went as a “couple” and endured, not the “promised” ninety minutes of high pressure sales, but FOUR hours, in addition to an hour back and forth to our destination.
Me negotiating 

After an absolutely amazing gourmet buffet (in which we liberally gorged for about an hour), a grueling sweaty walking tour of Disney-esque property, and another two hours of sales rigamarole, we escaped with two bottles of yummy flavored tequilas (coffee and almond), cash for a taxi back, 90% of which we pocketed, as we opted to share a cab (after seeing an “Alligator Crossing” sign) with another “couple,” and about $340 (US) apiece.  As a former actress, and timeshare connoisseur, I fared well.  Trenie?  Not so much.

“Never again,” she pouted.  “No matter how much I love you.”  We laughed and agreed that such “fun,” as well as an honest attempt at a reasonable buyout of my current timeshare ownerships, would from henceforth, be a “sola” act by me.  Without my “partner.”

We shared a taxi into town with a lovely Minnesota couple, who, like us, decided to walk to the main road for a bus, only to find out that on Sundays, buses weren’t so frequent, and, quite frankly, we could be wanting in the blazing sun for an hour!  We quickly bonded with the “newbie” couple. About 80% of the people ”gringos” meet here are either from Canada (mostly Winnipeg), or Minnesota.  As we hailed a taxi, and an elderly driver stopped for us, another , much younger driver, passed by shaking his finger at us as if to say, “No!  Don’t trust him!”

After some discussion with a “trabajador” (worker) a few yards away, we decided to indulge the old guy and hop aboard - for a pittance of what it would’ve cost us at the immediate entrance of the resort.  I immediately became the completely illl-equipped interpreter.  Halfway to El Centro, the blinking lights pulled us over.

“He ran a blinking yellow light,” said the Minnesotoan male in the front seat, as the elderly driver disembarked to go greet the “policia.”  I was, as I am in Santa Barbara, unnerved, as there are so many other “crimes” worth unravelling than a random “gringo transporter” running a yellow!

Nonetheless, our guy got out of the car and began to yell at the police!  Nonplussed, i told the Minnesota-ans and Trenie that we needed to be ready to hop out and catch a bus.  I warned them that such behavior could likely get the old guy “cuffed.”

But “cuffed” he was not, as he returned cursing, spitting, and shaking his head.  I kept telling him in Spanish that I was sorry this happened, but the female of the couple said, “He knows the rules, doesn’t he?”

“You must’ve been a teacher,” said Trenie.  And guess what?!  She was!  So there, in the back seat of an irate, rule-defying old Mexican’s taxi, sat three former school teachers, agreeing that the old fart was a hothead, and should’ve known better!

The couple got off with Trenie and me at Our Lady of Guadalupe, and we tipped the poor stubborn dude about a buck. (USUALLY, THERE IS NO TIPPING TO TAXI DRIVERS HERE, BUT IT HELPS - IF YOU GET THEIR NUMBER FOR FUTURE RIDES).

We gave the couple a quick overview of the lay of the land, and set them free to explore El Centro, the Romantic Zone,, the Malecon, and the amazing restaurants of Los Altas and Conchas Chinas.  We pointed out Our Lady of Guadalupe Church (NOT a Cathedral as many believe) perched like a hawk overlooking the town square where locals gather on Sunday evenings to dance, flirt, eat, and watch a movie!

The church buildings is topped with an elaborate crown, "allegedly designed to resemble a tiara worn by one of Emperor Maximilian's mistresses"
We, on the other hand, were headed to the Rio Cuale, under the bridge, to catch some shade, and perhaps make some shady deals on change purses and fans. (It’s hot!)

Trenie shopping on the Rio Cuale!
The dripping Banyan - read about this intriguing
epiphyte. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Banyan
The mercado (market) along the River Cuale is cool and charming, but more expensive for the usual trinkets.  


"Shaky" tourists rock and sway!




We strolled through the shade of Banyan trees, gave directions to... ...the“suspension bridge” to an elderly couple who could hardly walk (I don’t trust the suspension bridge), 
and stopped at El Huarachon to share a “Haurache,” the Mexican flatbread pizza loaded with carne asada, cheese, and salsa of roasted tomatoes and ancho chiles for 25 pesos ($1.72) but the drinks were $7 apiece!
Great for cheap yummy food - drinks, not so much








I pass by Martin at Huarachon daily!









A Carne Asada Haurache (Mexican pizza)









ADVICE:  Drink beer or water, cuz that’s where they getcha! (except for dollar Margarita’s at Cheeky Monkey, Sea Monkey, and Oceana). But man, was this Huarache delicious and filling!



Bag Ladies sell homemade purses!












We leisurely strolled through the weekly Farmer’s Market in the Old Town Square a block from the Blue Shrimp Restaurant, where prices are high (popular Gringo gathering), and everything has to be made from local ingredients. 






Meeting up with another gal, Rose, with whom Trenie had been conversing online for eight months, under a palapa on the beach, we sampled yummy candied pecans, dried mangos and kiwis, and a few other goodies.  Trenie and Rose each bought quite a bit, so they guy gave us all a free bag of our choice.  I chose the pecans and gobbled them up before you could say “deliciosos dulces!” (yummy candy). 

The array of choices on the candy cart, reminded me me of a dream I had many years ago of brilliantly-colored cotton balls along Highway 99 in Bakersfield, leading to a luminescent rainbow over the Grapevine!  As i enjoy my photographic glimpses of Mexico, one word repeatedly and consistently comes to mind - colorful.  Bright, deep, intense, and lovely - the colors make me feel alive!